Loading, please wait...Category: Digs | Living Room
Giving your girl coal on the most romantic day of the year might sound like a bad idea, but this isn't the same stuff Santa has been cramming into your stocking ever since you stole that candy bar when you were 11. These ashy-looking sticks are made in Japan and are incredibly interesting to look at. The outside is ashy, while the ends, where they were cut, are shiny and marbled. Each stick has millions of "micro-cavities" which absorb moisture when it's humid and then re-release it when it gets dry. They also act as a fantastic, unscented air freshener, by absorbing all the stink out of the air. Once it stops working, you can "recharge" it by simply sitting it in the sun. One bundle will run you $20, but you'll get to spend all that time explaining the gift, which will make you sound like you really put a lot of thought into it.
Flowers can be a totally lame gift for V-day if you're just going to order up some cheesy, themed arrangement with a firetruck-shaped vase and a card that says, "You set my heart on fire" or some other cheesy slogan that they stole from one of those little candy hearts. If you're going to go the flower route, opt for an interesting vase like this 10-inch porcelain piece of art. It's designed to give the illusion that it's traveling at a high rate of speed. It's cool looking, it's different and it probably won't end up thrown in the garbage once the flowers inside of it die and the gross water spills all over her living room floor. $160.
Yankee Stadium Seat
By Fresno
If you're a baseball fan, you probably have strong feeligns about the New York Yankees in one way or another. But, there's no denying the fact that a lot of history went down in the old Yankee Stadium. Each one of these $750 seats has a genuine back and bottom from a seat taken out of the stadium before the Bronx gave it the business with a wrecking ball and some explosives. The arms are made from cast iron, so you'll just need a beef hot dog and a whole pile of yelling, belligerent fans to get the full experience.
Zero Edge Aquariums
By Fresno
We always said that, if we became super villains, we would get a giant fish tank to put in our office so our enemies would know we meant business. We're tweaking that little now and opting for one of these "high definition" aquariums. These aquariums have no top and the water runs down the sides of the glass into hidden drains. From there it's recirculated back into the tank. The result is a glass-like sheet of water on the outside of your tank that makes everything inside look incredible. It's also quiet, energy efficient and a heck of a lot cooler than that old 2-liter bottle you've been keeping your fish in. $1,299 and up.
Fender Blackface HotSeat
By Fresno
If you need storage and an extra seat in your house, Fender may have the coolest solution ever. While the HotSeat doesn't actually work like an amp, it looks the part to a T. That's because Fender builds each one to the exact spec as they do their audio rigs. Inside you'll find a place to store, well, whatever needs storing around your house. The interior is lined with swanky red padding to keep all of your trinkets safe. Plus, there's a cushion on top, so you can make someone sit on it when all of your jerk family members come over for Thanksgiving. $180.
Cinelounger CinePet Lounger
By Fresno
If there's one thing home theater freaks and pet fanatics have in common, it's that they're not afraid to spend thousands of dollars on crap to fuel their obsessions. This wacky piece of furniture combines both of those mad worlds into one incredibly expensive dog couch. The 54-inch couch has "treat storage" in the arm and a stainless steel holder for a dog bowl. It comes in a whole heap of different colors to match the rest of the company's line of home theater chairs. The velvet version costs $1,695 and the leather version runs $1,995. Sure, it's a lot of money, but it'll look classier in your living room than the filthy towel your dog currently sleeps on.
Slam Gaming Towers
By Fresno
We know that Xbox 360 is awesome, but having controllers and game cases strewn about your living room makes it look like you live in a dorm room. This handy tower has space for up to 16 games, four controllers and your console, all of which get neatly stacked so they stay out of the way. There's even a side rack for your Guitar Hero controller, which we know you have tripped over at least once. There's also a verion for the Wii, but we'll have to find more than two Wii games worth buying before we'll spring for that one. Take that, cute console! $60.
Herman Miller Setu Chair
By Fresno
You spend enough time planted in your office chair that it's worth shelling out some petty cash for a good one. The Setu has a "kinematic" spine that flexes to accommodate your butt. There are no knobs or buttons to adjust. You just sit down and let the tuned elastomers do their flexible thing. Each chair will cost you $600, but that's a lot cheaper than a bunch of trips to the chiropractor. Plus, it's 93% recyclable which makes it as good for the environment as it is for your vertebrae.
Music Chocolate Ottoman
By Fresno
We have no complaints about the big ass reclines we currently spend 90% of our days in, but having an ottoman in your living room makes it look like you have class. This padded, leather cube is made for putting your feet up, but it has an entire sound system built-in. There's a line in so you can hook up your MP3 player and rock out while you chill out. Or, you can just play scary Halloween sounds and watch your guests get scared when they can't figure out where they're coming from. It's also worth noting that it's not actually chocolate. They just call it that because it's brown.
Foosball Coffee Table
By Fresno
There is no doubt that the most annoying part of playing foosball is having the ball fly out of the top of the table and cram iteslf under some huge, unmovable appliance. With this coffee table, there's no chance of that happening. This regulation-size playing surface is covered with a sturdy transparent cap that doubles as a coffee table. It also does away with the other annoying part about foosball, which is having to stand up to play. It will cost you $600, but it will be well worth it, since you'll be able to use it to resolve all disputes that might go down in your house. Who's going to take out the garbage? The little soccer players will decide that.
Shuriken Coasters
By Fresno
We have never had much need for coasters, mostly because all of our furniture has been rigged together out of stuff we got for free on Craigslist, but these ninja stars might be too cool to pass up. You can get them in acrylic ($38, plastic) or cough up $142 for the aluminum versions. You get a set of nine, most of which you will almost certainly lose when you can no longer resist the urge to whip them at your buddies. Either way, it'll probably go great with your Samurai sword coat rack.
Dyson DC31 Vacuum
By Fresno
We know what you're thinking: "Oh a vacuum. Cool story bro!" But, in addition to looking like some kind of weapon from Halo 3, the DC31 also contains what inventor James Dyson has claimed to be the fastest motor in the world. Apparently it hits a whopping 104,000 RPMs. That means that it'll suck the crap out of your couch cushions and just about anything else you put the nozzle against. Or, you can take the motor out and make the fastest remote controlled car of all time. We suggest that using it as a vacuum thing, though. $219.
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