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Pet Pooch Power System
By Fresno
Dogs are great. They're loyal, fun and they aren't stupid cats. But, the downside is that they crap all over the place and it's your job as a responsible owner to pick it up. The Pet Pooch Power System means to take the bending over and that awful feeling of warm poop through a thin plastic bag right out of the equation. It's literally a vacuum designed to suck the crap up off of your lawn or the sidewalk. The built-in battery can dispose of up to 150 piles (depending on the kind of dog you have and how much fiber it has been getting) before it needs a charge. You'll have to buy some bag refills if you want your $100 crap sucker to keep working. Or just have a kid. They're great for this kind of thing.
Poseidon Patio Heater
By fresno
You spent the entire summer building your deck and now it's too cold out to sit on the stupid thing. That's where portable heating units like this come in very hand. The Poseidon is 6.5-feet tall and uses carbon fibre (excuse the spelling, they're from Europe) heating tubes to make them cheap to operate. Each one has two heat settings (1350W and 2700W) as well as a built-in media player and speakers. That means you can sit outside and enjoy music or video without ending up looking like Encino Man before Samweiss dug him out of that ice block. ~$1,500.
Jagermeister Shot Cooler
By Fresno
First let us say this: If you're having a party that will require six cold bottles of Jager, then we want to be invited. Secondly, you should definitely buy this cooler, which is specifically designed to keep your delicious liquid cold and dispense shots through an integrated spigot. There's a huge Jager logo on the side, too, so, while we KNOW you would never drink and drive, it might be a good idea to keep it in the trunk when you're driving around with it in the car.
Husqvarna LGT2554 Mower
By Fresno
There is still plenty of time left in lawn mowing season and you shouldn't spend it pushing around the clapped out old junker you've had since the '90s. This tractor has a 54-inch deck powered by a twin-cylinder Kohler engine that pushes out 25 hp. Operation is extremely simple, with options like single-button blade engagement and an hour-tracker that helps you stay on track with regular maintenance. Perhaps the most important element, though, are the guage wheels that prevent you from scraping your lawn down to dirt.
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